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lyrics

well I’ve been playing a video game
where there are no checkpoints and no way to save
and I’ve been playing this game for twenty-three years
and I’ve been making good time, and I think I’m doing fine
but if I fall behind, well that’s my greatest fear
‘cause I don’t know how to hit reset, and I don’t know how to quit
well I’ve got an idea, but I’m far too scared to attempt it
and no matter how hard I’ve tried, I’ve never found a strategy guide
though I found some decent walkthroughs when I looked online
but when I read them all, they said a different thing each time
and all I’m asking, please, is:
can I get my money back? can I get my money back?
can I trade this life for another one, maybe one with rules I can understand?
can I take this back and sell it? or maybe credit I get some in-store credit?
can I trade this life for another one, maybe one where I won’t really care if I win or lose
‘cause I think I’m going to lose

I had a chat with the creator of the universe
said “can I pause this game just for a while, so I can rehearse?”
he said, “not yet son, but we’ve got a team that’s working on that
it won’t be ready in your lifetime but be sure to come back
when we build the next system”
and that’s when I screamed at him:
can I get my money back? can I get my money back?
can I trade this life for another one, maybe one where I’m not trapped inside?
you gave me nothing but deceit, yeah, you never even gave me a receipt
so can I trade this life for another one, maybe one where I won’t have to die when I finally lose?
‘cause I know I’m going to lose

credits

from Epic Fail, released July 20, 2018

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Something and the Whatevers Lawrence, Kansas

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